Thursday, July 9, 2015

TOP 10 CONFEDERATE 'THINGS" ENDANGERED BY CONFEDERAPHOBIA (SEE THE LIST)



We put a panel of experts together and tried to figure out other potential targets of Confederaphobia.  Here are things that our panel says may be in danger next.  We are giving these in 10 to 1 order, 10 being relatively safer, 1 being in the gravest danger of the post-modern extremist movement:

10.  BUMBLE BEES - because they are connected to the confederate flag.  Bumble bees fly.  The confederate flag once flew.  Both fly.  See the connection?

9.  THE LETTER C - because it is the first letter in the C-word and you can't spell the C-word without the letter C.  We will need a substitute for the letter C.  Maybe we could user ^ or some other symbol to avoid ^onfederacy.  (Historical fact:  The French tried this very same tactic during the French Revolution, renaming days of the week, months of the hear, holidays, even inventing a new system of measurements to avoid the traditional system).*

8.  CHECKERS - because the game is played on a board with diagonal red squares that resemble a ^federate flag.  You ^an't play ^he^kers without thinking of the ^onfederate flag.

7.  MAGNOLIAS - because of the movie "Steel Magnolias," which had a Southern theme and is bound to raise hateful, racist memories of the ^onfederacy.  Besides, magnolias are a Southern tree. 

6.THE PYRAMIDS - Obviously, these were built with slave labor and stand as constant reminders of slavery and oppression.  Let's call for them to be torn down.  They are, of course, historical and cultural - but built by slaves, nonetheless. They have to go!

5.   THE LETTER X - because the X is actually used on the ^onfederate battle flag and is even more offensive than the letter ^, which has already been blacklisted.

4.  ^HITTLINS - because they were the second most common food in the ^onfederacy.

3.  HARMONICAS - because this was the most widely adaptable and used portable musical instrument by ^onfederate soldiers.  It's music is de facto racist, hateful and offensive. Harmoni^as used by Yankee soldiers could be acceptable provided adequate documentation can be produced that no ^onfederate soldier ever touched them.

2.  MOCKINGBIRDS - because they sing in weeping willow trees over the graves of ^onfederate soldiers.  There was once even a movie titled "To Kill a Mockingbird."  It was set in a Southern (ex-^onfederate) town in Alabama. It was written by Harper Lee, who was born in Alabama (an ex-^onfederate state).   Mockingbirds also fly.  (See Bumble Bees).

1.  CORNBREAD - because it was the official food of the ^onfederacy, fed thousands of ^onfederate soldiers and is still recognized as a Southern delicacy.  You just can't think of ^ornbread without thinking of "that flag," the South and the ^onfederacy.  We debated buttermilk but our panel cannot agree whether it is endangered or not.  We actually think nothing is safe.  Based on contemportary post modern reasoning (or lack thereof), anything can be connected to the ^onfedera^y. 

*HISTORIC FACT: it kind of reminds me of the French Revolution in the 18th Century, during which the enlightened French renamed the days of the week and the months of the year, outlawed traditional measurements and invented metrics to replace feet, ounces, gallons bushels and snorts. The French radicals even made Christmas come during the summer-- anything to break with history or tradition.  I'm trying to think how long it took for all that irrational nonsense to abate.  Some of it never did.


 

CHECKER BOARDS OFFENSIVE: MUST BE REMOVED

As black members of the US Congress forced the majority to outlaw the display of Confederate flags on graves, a new round of Confederaphobia has swept America.  The inordinate fear of the Confederacy will soon force the banning of checkers.

If you notice the checker board, it is made up of squares, usually of either black and red and red and blue--the same basic pattern of the Confederate flag.  Someone looking at a checker board over a friendly game of checkers might be reminded of the awful symbol of racism and rate.  That would be terrible.  So, expect a Congressional ban on checker boards.  Even if the board could be redesigned into something less offensive, such as an Isis or Al-Queda flag, just the act of playing checkers might bring back suppressed memories of a Confederate flag.  So, it would be best to outlaw checkers, altogether.  We suppose Rep. John Lewis of Georgia, Nancy Pelosi and other leaders of the US House will stand with the minority members of Congress to legislate this ban.

There is already a call for removal of statues of Confederate heroes from parks, courthouses and roadsides.  Even Republicans in the Senate on Thursday called for a look at removing all Civil War artifacts from public display (we suppose only Southern artifacts).

We are not sure just how far this rabid Confederaphobia will carry.  I recently joked about the North shooting its prisoners.  I meant that to be a metaphor but today, I may have been too optimistic. I would not be surprised if some of the Democrats in the House called for digging up Confederate soldiers in federal cemeteries, shooting them, and reburying them.  Really, they are on a roll, they smell blood and taste blood--and there is just no telling if there will ever be a rational end of this thing.

 

Sunday, July 5, 2015

SHOOTING THE PRISONERS

"Today's culture war is much more brutal than the real war."

If the Civil War had ended in 2015, the winning army would be shooting its prisoners!

On April 9, 1865, General Lee met U.S. Grant at the little village of Appomattox, Virginia to surrender his army.  After the simple ceremony of surrender, Lee offered his sword to Grant.  The Union general refused, passing a simple gentleman's courtesy to his legendary enemy.  As Lee mounted Traveler to ride away, the Union army began to cheer.  "None of that!" Grant ordered, "the rebs are our countrymen again."

President Lincoln faced jubilant Union troops in Richmond on the evening of April 10th and the crowds called for a speech.  Instead, Lincoln turned to the military band and asked them to play "Dixie."  To those who showed surprise, Lincoln said, "We must let them know that the song is safe with us."

By contrast, nothing is safe with today's liberal Left.

If the war had ended today, the victors would be shooting prisoners.  The civility of 1865 has vanished.  Today's culture war is much more brutal and vicious than the real war. It also compromises the very values that were won in the real war and in the one hundred and fifty years of political melee that followed.
 

WHAT'S BEHIND CONFEDERAPHOBIA?

CONFEDERAPHOBIA is the irrational panic related to anything remotely connected to the old Southern Confederacy, which existed from 1861 to 1865.  This phobia surrounds relics or objects that are perceived to have some political connection to the corpse of the Confederacy, which was embalmed and buried in April of 1865.

Like all phobias, its center mass expands to invade not just the original target (the 1861-1865 confederation of Southern states) - but anything remotely connected by philosophy, culture or imagination.  Thus, the imagined danger can include the fear or hatred of a region of the country (the South), the culture of the South, historical references to the South, even to entertainment with a remote reference to that culture.  For example, people can come to fear TV shows such as The Dukes of Hazzard, Gone with the Wind, To Kill a Mockingbird; or historical novels, biographies or video games.

And why do we love to hate Confederate flags?  The following reasons are plausible:
  • It's easier to fear and attack something you can see, something physical.  A visible enemy is not as frightening as an invisible one.  You may not see racism, hatred, terrorism, Naziism, or a thousand other hateful ideas - but you can see the Confederate flag.  Transfer your hostilities to something visible.  Let the object symbolize whatever it is that you hate or fear.
  • It is easier to remove a Confederate flag than it is to remove the real evils in our society.  You can remove a flag from a building in 5 minutes. That may make you feel better.  It does nothing to remove the real problem.
  •  Government feels called upon to do something -- and anything is better than nothing.  After any national disaster, be it a flood, hurricane or terror attack, government leaders are expected to respond.  Above all, they must never be honest and say, "There is nothing rational that we can do in response to this disaster." So, they invent something to do - even if it is inconsequential, illogical or downright stupid.  In this case, all they could think of was removing the Confederate flag.  It doesn't accomplish anything; in fact, it probably is a retrograde political move that sets us back 150 years--but is the only thing government or society knows to do.
  • Politicians must try to show support and solidarity with the victims of disaster.  It is a basic requirement of all persons who hold elected office--to identify with voters in their time of need. When 9 persons were murdered in South Carolina, it was natural and necessary for politicians to come together and show how aghast and horrified they were, and how to show show how much they protested the horrible act.  When activists began to appear on national television calling for the removal of Confederate flags, what political leader could fail to support their cause under these circumstances.  It would matter in the least how irrelevant, impertinent or ineffective their position might be--nobody could ever dare oppose it.  If those who declared themselves in support of the victims wanted to ban apple pie, motherhood, the American flag, baseball, or anything else, the politicians had absolutely no choice but to sign on.  The issues were being picked by the victims and their ad hoc spokesmen, not by the political leaders.  Can you imagine going on TV and saying, "Wait a minute.  I don't know what good removing a Confederate flag is going to do"?  It isn't conceivable that any politician would have an inclination to say that in public.  Without restraint, then, those who took it upon themselves to speak for the victims of the disaster rule the day and there is absolutely no restraint to the credulous demands that they may make.

  • Finally - there are individuals and organizations who make their living off of racial division.  If racial harmony and non-discrimination were ever achieved, these individuals would be out of a job, out of influence--and they would have to go to work in a real job.  Their job, therefore, is to be sure that there is always racial tension.

CONFEDERAPHOBIA: 1865 VS. 2015

When Robert E. Lee surrendered his army on April 9, 1865, it ended the most bloody conflict in American history (before or since).  Approximately 500,000 Americans had died during the bloody conflict.  The country was literally torn apart, physically, politically and economically.

On the evening of April 10, 1865, jubilation came over the city of Washington, DC.  When President Abraham Lincoln appeared, the merry-making crowds chanted, "Speech, speech, speech!"  Lincoln stated that he would deliver a speech the following day, on April 11, after he had prepared.  He turned to the military band and asked that they play the song "Dixie."  Lincoln said, "It is good to show the rebels that with us they will be free to hear it again."

Two days later, Lincoln would be dead.  His conciliatory policies toward the fallen South would die with him.  Radical Republicans, led by Sen. Charles Sumner of Massachusetts, would seek to punish the South for the damage of the War.  Even in this post-Lincoln environment of hatred for the South, nobody disputed the gallantry of the Southerners who fought for the defeated Confederacy.

154 years later brings us to the year 2015.  Today, there is much more hatred toward the corpse of the Confederacy than there was in 1865.  We choose to look back 154 years and reopen all the wounds of the War Between the States, to no one's advantage--unless it leverages divisive politicians who dare not allow the sectional and racial divisions that keep them in power to heal.

If, during the brutal reality of 1865, Lincoln could call for the playing of "Dixie," why now, in 2015, must we call for the destruction of Confederate flags, Southern culture, and even movies and video games with Southern references?  

As many have recently pointed out, the South lost the War.  Why then do they insist on shooting their prisoners?

In another post, I will attempt to address why post-modern liberals (and some neoconservatives) want to burn the Confederate flag.  Why is the current irrational Confederaphobia so rampant?  What is it they really fear?

CONFEDERAPHOBIA: ERADICATION OF ALL THINGS SOUTHERN

A phobia is a type of anxiety disorder, usually defined as a persistent fear of an object or situation in which the sufferer commits to great lengths in avoiding, typically disproportional to the actual danger posed, often being recognized as irrational.

The phobia now sweeping the United States is Confederaphobia - the extreme and irrational fear of all things Confederate.  It may be argued that Confederaphobia has an ever wider root--the fear of all things Southern.

The Confederate States of America was born in February 1861 just before the inauguration of Abraham Lincoln and it vanished on April 9, 1865 when Robert E. Lee surrendered the Army of Norther Virginia.  For 154 years, the corpse of the Confederacy has existed only in museums, history books and a few old TV shows or motion pictures.

Then, in June of 2015, a crazed madman committed a tragic act of murder in Charleston, SC that rekindled a political reaction to remove the "Confederate flag" from the South Carolina capitol building. Race baiting activists and politicians raced to seize the moment to declare their solidarity with the victims of the tragedy, not bad or unusual, except that they didn't know where to stop. With 24 hours, a new Confederaphobia swept the nation--as political leaders of both parties sprang to be first to endorse the removal of all things Confederate, indeed all things Southern, from the American consciousness.  It was no longer just about a historic battle flag--it was about a culture--a way of life--a geographic region of the country.  The unwilling corpse of the old Confederacy was raised to life and the Civil War began to be fought all over again.  The bloody shirt was waved by Northerners and liberals and everything they hate came to be symbolized in the physical symbol of the "Confederate flag."  The North didn't show nearly this much resentment to the South in 1865, even during radical Reconstruction.

And it was no longer just about government.  Wal Mart, Ebay, Amazon and dozens of retailers pledged to remove any vestige of the cultural South from the culture.  This included video games, TV shows, movies and Southern recepies.  Immediately, Gone with the Wind, Southern Magnolias, the Dukes of Hazzard--anything with a Southern theme or reference had to disappear.

The Governor of Alabama ordered the removal of the Confederate flag, probably in keeping with the wishes of the national GOP which felt it an opportune time to get rid of what it perceived as an albatross around its neck.  The governor found no Confederate flag atop the Alabama capitol (it had been removed in 1992), so he hastily ordered the removal of Confederate flags from memorials and Civil War museums.

Not too surprisingly in today's ultra politically correct society, almost nobody has the balls to stand up to Confederaphobia and call it what it is--irrational, ridiculous, stupid and unnecessary.  

The thing that lasted only 4 brief years and vanished in 1865 has suddenly become the number one threat to America and the most feared entity in the national consciousness.  We seem to fear the old Confederacy (and all remotely related Southern culture) much more than we fear Isis, Al-Queda, global terrorism, the Iranian nuclear bomb, or any other clear and present danger.  There is presently no end in site.  Confederaphobia is rampant.  Like all phobias, it is driver by irrational fear and the need to condense intangible problems into an object that can be seen and destroyed.  It is much easier to destroy the Confederate flag, as stupid as that is, than to deal with the real cause of the tragedy in South Carolina, which the flag had nothing to do with.

Wednesday, July 1, 2015

CONFEDERATE HEROES SERIES: JEB STUART

James Ewell Brown (JEB) Stuart (February 6, 1833 - May 12, 1864) was born to lead cavalry.  His lavish decor belied the seriousness of Stuart's skill as a cavalry officer.  During the War Between the States, he was bedecked with a red lined gray cape, yellow sash, ostrich plume in his hat and a red flower in his lapel.  He was always mounted on a marvelous horse and usually wore cologne.  Some called him "the last cavalier."  He became known as a master of reconnaissance and he came to use the cavalry in support of important offensive operations.

At West Point, Stuart had earned the nickname "Beauty," supposedly because a weak chin endeared him with the opposite characteristics of that nickname.  Shortly after graduation, Stuart grew a prolific beard, of which a contemporary noted, "Stuart is one of the few men I ever saw whose appearance was improved by a beard.". Prior to the Civil War, Stuart saw action against hostile Indians in Kansas. Upon his return to Virginia, Stuart became aide-de-camp to Major Robert E. Lee.  Stuart accompanied Lee in the raid on Harper's Ferry which captured John Brown and his gang.

 He was commissioned a captain on April 22, 1861.  But when Virginia seceded, JEB resigned his commission on May 3, 1861 and offered his sword to the defense of his native state.  He was commissioned Lt. Col. of the Virginia infantry on May 10, 1861.  Stuart participated in the first battle of Bull Run and pursued fleeing federals.  He was promoted to Brig. General on September 24, 1861.

Stuart assisted Gen. Joseph E. Johnston's army during the Peninsula campaign in Virginia, supporting Johnston's army as it withdrew from the Peninsula.  During the Northern Virginia campaign, JEB was promoted to Major General on July 25, 1862.

Stuart's wife, Flora,bore him a daughter on November 14, 1857.  During the Northern Virginia campaign, Stuart received a telegram that little Flora had died on November 3, 1862, from Typhoid, just short of her fifth birthday.  His son, James Ewell Brown Stuart, Jr. ("Jimmie") had been born on June 26, 1860.  

When General Lee began moving his Army of Northern Virginia northward toward Maryland during October 10-12, 1862, Stuart's cavalry screened the movement.   During the Chambersburg Raid, Stuart embarrassed the federal army by riding clear around it, from Darkesville, West Virginia, across the corner of Maryland and to Leesburg, Virginia--a distance of 126 miles in a little less than 60 hours.  He captured horses and supplies.

At Chancellorsville, Stuart joined Stonewall Jackson in his famous outflanking march against federal General Joseph Hooker.  When General A.P. Hill, commanding the Second Corp. was seriously wounded, Jackson asked Stuart to take charge of the Corp.  Many consider Stuart's handling of Hill's infantry corp at Chancellorsville to be among the most brilliant work of the war.  Stuart led the Corp in a strong, successful attack against the federal left flank, contributing to a sound victory.

After Gettysburg, Lee's army fought mostly defensive battles and concentrated on preventing the capture of Richmond.  Stuart used his cavalry effectively, both as instruments of defense and, at times, probing offense.  

In May, 1864, General Philip Sheridan's cavalry threatened Richmond.  On May 11, Stuart was supporting Confederate infantry that was driving the federals from high ground near an abandoned inn named Yellow Tavern-- about six miles north of Richmond. A brigade of the enemy was preparing to charge Stuart's left flank.  General Stuart was mounted and came riding with his staff to form a line of resistance to the charge.  About a dozen shots were directed toward Stuart who sat his horse firing into the melee with his revolver.   As the 5th Michigan cavalry came streaming past the Confederates in retreat, a dismounted 44 year-old infantryman named Robert A. Huff lifted his pistol almost casually and fired at the big man on a black horse.  The bullet struck JEB Stuart in his side, passed through his stomach and exited his back.  He slumped in his saddle, managing not to fall from his horse and be captured. As an aid rushed beside him, he asked,  "Are you hit, General?"  Stuart replied, "John, I am afraid they have killed me."

As Stuart was being lifted from the battlefield, some Confederates came rushing past him in retreat.  Stuart lifted himself and yelled, "Go back, men.  Go back and do your duty, as I have done mine.  I would rather die than be whipped."

Stuart was taken by ambulance to the home of his brother in law, Dr. Charles Brewer of Richmond.. Jefferson Davis paid a short visit around noon.  Word was sent to Flora and little Jimmie, whom JEB wanted to see for a final time. Because Mrs. Stuart received the message late and due to difficulty traveling through war torn roads, Mrs. Stuart and the children arrived after the General had died.  During the afternoon of May 12, Stuart was growing weaker, drifting in and out of consciousness.  He asked his doctor if death was approaching.  The doctor replied, "I am afraid so."  Stuart asked about his horse and was told that the animal was well and being looked after. He then disposed of all his worldly possessions, leaving his golden spurs to Mrs. Robert E. Lee and his magnificent saber to his young son.  JEB called for a hymn and tried to join his general staff as they sang Rock of Ages...Cleft for me, Let me hide myself in Thee...

   "I must be prepared for another world," Stuart said.  The doctor offered whiskey but Stuart refused.  "I promised my mother I would never use it.  Besides, it tastes like fire and cannot possibly do me any good."  In the ensuing delirium, Stuart relived earlier military exploits and issued new orders for his couriers.  In a moment of lucidness, the General whispered, "I am resigned to die if I have done my duty to my country and to my God.  God's will be done."

At 7:38 PM on May 12, 1864,  JEB Stuart died.  He was mourned throughout the Confederacy and word of his passing spread to Europe and beyond.

His wife, Flora, wore the black clothes of mourning for the rest of her life and never remarried.  She now rests with her husband at Hollywood Cemetery in Richmond.

JEB Stuart is still considered one of the greatest leaders of cavalry ever born.  His friend from his federal army days, Union Maj. Gen. John Sedgewick said that Stuart was "the greatest cavalry officer ever foaled in America." 

Gen. Robert E. Lee, upon learning of Stuart's death, said that he could barely think of him without tears.  Lee added that Stuart had never given him a bad piece of information.